i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Just high enough for therapy.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
