I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
