So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
