I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
