he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
