There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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