i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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