Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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