fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
