you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
