That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
