I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
