Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Randomize