I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
