I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
