I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
