I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
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