No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
vagina is talking i cant
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize
