i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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