lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize