i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
