I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
