Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Randomize
