Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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