that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
