Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
