I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Randomize
