I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
