i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
