I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Randomize
