you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
