he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
