apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I'm determined to sit on that face.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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