My brain says no but my pants say off.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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