hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize