I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Found your dick twin last night
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
