Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
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