ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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