i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Randomize
