what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
