dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
