I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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