try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
