For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
