Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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