There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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