oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
