who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I need a beard to bite.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
