I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
