we're blogging at a bar
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
