we have pet lesbian snakes
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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