so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
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