I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Randomize
