But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Randomize
